A little behind Death by Numbers

Want to know a little secret? A little secret about my novel, Death by Numbers, that I'm so feverishly pumping info about via social media?

I never intended to like it. My real focus had been on my book baby, my first novel that I felt a calling to write and share the story of, which is at the opposite end of the genre spectrum from DbN. It was (and still fairly is) my primary focus when it comes to my novels. I finished writing it back in January, and had completed the editing by mid-February. It wasn't until I had sent queries out to about 300 publishers and agents that I started to get curious about self-publishing. I'd read about it and though it seemed interesting, I was hell bent on the fact that traditional was the way to go for me, mainly since I had no clue in hell how I could do all the work on the publishing side. After a little research I began to realize that regardless of whether I tried the traditional route or the indie, self-pubbed route, I'd have to put the marketing on my shoulders.

The main interest in my first novel that I've gotten back so far has been from small publishers, or those who are self-proclaimed publishers, but when they send you the contract info they also tack on a fee for 'editing and marketing'. What the heck? No seriously, that's called vanity press, guys. I may be fresh, but I didn't just exit my mother's birth canal last night. Even the other small traditional publishers offer little for the money they take. Do they do the editing for you? Yes. Do they handle the book covers, regardless of their bad tastes? Oh yes. Personally, I was so weirded out by the fact that I'd be handing over at least 80 percent of my royalties (without a measly advance may I remind you) to a publishing company who would have me doing just as much of the work as if I'd self published, that I began to wonder about self publishing. Of course, I wanted to keep my other novel in circulation. That book is my prime steak. The one that is a story that I felt necessary to tell. Even a snarky small press took the time to tell me how good of a story it was even though they were up to their eyeballs in this and that and had little time to do anything, but they were interested even though my grammar 'should have me out the door'.  As well as my foul language that I allowed one of the characters to display...when he was going through a dark moment....that they took out and sent back to me with the language removed. Needless to say, what the hell asshole?

I digress.

I was beyond curious about self publishing, to the point where I decided I'd create a little series of novellas to test the waters, because I wanted to give my main book the chance it deserves floating through various in-boxes. There are tons of short stories online available via Amazon who have a great following and there was nothing like my books that were floating around as a mini series (mostly romance or erotica with gorgeous eye candy on the cover). Each short I'd publish would be one story in the 'Death by Numbers' series, and even though they wouldn't have a direct connection, they would cross paths in some way or another. As I continued writing I began to fall in love with the characters and even though they were only around for a brief moment, I still felt they shined and connect into the next so well. Then it hit me that I'd be doing a disservice to my stories if I didn't let them shine a little brighter. So instead of the original idea that I had for them to be ten separated  shorts, I decided to let them all chain together in the same book and cross each others paths a little bit more.

About half way through the book I realized that there was something larger at hand for the characters, regardless of if they knew it or not. They hadn't just crossed paths by happenstance, but that there was a bigger issue at play that in the end takes the book in a totally different direction than I had planned. Thus, my novellas have turned into a story where they vaguely intertwine together at the very end of the book to give light on an even larger concept than simply their deaths.

Even though I planned for this book to only be an experiment, I've really fallen in love with it.

Enter gushy meme face here.

-C.B. Burdette

The Gender of Writing

Similar to my tendencies of indecisiveness of whether or not to blog, I've had the constant battle of whether or not to upload a photo of myself for the corner "About Me" section.

Every author blog I've yet to stumble upon has the all too familiar author headshot sitting in the corner, starting at the reader on the other side of the screen. I'm sure that this gives some sort of personalization with the reader. When people can look at a photo and go 'Ah, that's who wrote this', I'm sure it gives them a sense of connection. I do have to wonder though, to what cost? Isn't the best part about reading a book the mysteriousness of story telling? Doesn't that somewhat become shaded over with some invisible haze when we find out the gender of authors?

Being that this is a worry of mine, I keep my pen name to a neutral, unrelated to gender, name. I can't help but fathom how one's writing becomes depicted in the subconscious dwellings of our mind when we become aware of an author's gender. I feel it can put limitations on writers. "Women know best of this subject, and men prevail in writing on those topics" are things that come up, even nowadays, generations after gender equality has been legally established. Even in modern times we have stigmas as to what's right for either gender.

Though, I'm not sure how long it could last, I like remaining gender neutral. I wouldn't want someone judging my work for how a male or female writer should write. Quite honestly I don't want it to be judged at all, but would rather it be a story to take someones mind off the everyday hassles of life. Then again, what is life without some sort of judgement. It's one of the main things as a modern society we do have to dwell upon. Turn on the television and you'll see judgements happening left and right.

Of course, I don't have any pieces of work floating around quite yet. At the moment I lack the need to be judged, however when they are out there, I'd hope for at least a minuscule amount of time that they could be judged for what they are, rather than for whom wrote them.

Your gender anonymous,
C.B. Burdette


P.S. I'm not completely insane. I do in fact realize that the majority of people reading this at the present time are well aware of my masculinity/femininity as you all are friends and family. Eventually there shall be others ;)

Decision of Blogging

The decision to take my writing to the blogging realm has been a bi-polar hell.

"Oh every author should have a blog!" They all say. But what in the dickens is a writer supposed to write about on their blog? Especially an author who's yet to be published. One of the likes who's still sifting their first creation through the in-boxes of countless publishers and agents. One who has yet to get a strong hook in the mouth of either to reel in for dinner. One who would like a strong bite, yet has only felt nibbles.

Do I write about my work? That is, the work that I care for everyone to see. The work of which I bled out of my fingers for months to land in the hands of readers, yet only is only drifting from trash folder to trash folder? Or do you write little short stories to appease to the likes of readers surfing the web. Pulling them in one by one with your miniature adventures that last only a few paragraphs long. 

Although I'm still not 100% sure as to what it is that an author should post on an 'author blog', I did do a little research and guess what? Apparently you can use a blog like everyone else. Letting people get a little piece of the person who wrote the novel they so dearly love. Or in my case, the author of the novel they've yet to even hear of.

It was an interesting little 'diddy', when I realized that 'Holy Hell!', I can just blog about me. Me the author, rather than 'me' the character in my book, or 'me' the campaign manager of my self-published (or yet to be self-published), or simply published, book.

This was the turning point upon which I decided I would blog. It felt cool and breezy when I realized I wouldn't have to think so hard to blog.

Perhaps, this could actually be beneficial when my novel does launch, regardless if it ends up published by some traditional publishing house, or by the lone C.B. Burdette pubishing.

Dearest,

C.B. Burdette

(I will keep you company once a week. Promise ;))